(Photo credit by PEXELS – picjumbo.com)
If you want to take your long distance relationship to the next level, you bound to have to meet up with your love ones even if he is across the ocean. But before getting to the meeting stage with a stranger you met online, started off from an online relationship. I highly suggest that you get to know him or her really well first. I also don’t suggest the two of you to meet if both of you are under legal age, unless you have your parents to come along with you.
There are several points that you can tell whether your partner is serious with you and whether you should move this relationship to the next step. One of them is your love one always have time to spend with you no matter how busy he or she is. The one that only looks for you when he or she ‘miss you’ after a few days or months is a no go. You can also tell by seeing how serious your love one is to make this meeting work out.
Click here for more to know How to Tell if Your Partner is Serious with You (will be updated soon!)
For me and my husband, it took us 6 months after we started dating to have our first meeting. It took this long due to some matters and obstacles that got in our way. But we took this as a blessing in disguise, because if both of us have never gone through what we have. We would probably not appreciate each other as much as we have now.
Here are the 5 steps on how we make our first meet up to work:
1) Plan WHEN do you want to meet
Both of you have your own lives, if you’re both students and are from different countries, you would probably have different public and school holidays. If you’re both working, you will also have to plan on the days when there is the same public holiday or the times the two of you can take your paid leave.
In my case, I work from home and my husband works in an office. My time is more flexible than his, as for him, he have to apply leave in advance so we can make this meet up work. In our case, because of the obstacles he have to go through, we ended up meeting six months after we got together. And because he can’t take too many leaves, we ended up meeting only for 3 nights 4 days.
2) Plan WHERE do you want to meet
After deciding when you two can meet, next is to plan where to meet. I highly suggest that the two of you plan to meet in a middle country. For example, in our case, I am from Indonesia and my husband is from the Philippines, so to be fair and our budget friendly range, we decided to meet in Malaysia, Kuala Lumpur, so both of us don’t have to go through any transit difficulties and waiting that will just be a waste of time. Also, for us, Kuala Lumpur is a city big enough to plan our romantic dates, fun adventurous meeting and eating delicious food!
After deciding when and where we want to meet, we use the app Traveloka to see how much the ticket price cost. For those who don’t know what is Traveloka, it is a fantastic company especially for south-east Asia region that can compare different flight prices and help you book the flight ticket that you want without you having to make multiple accounts for different airlines to book ticket online.
3) Plan your BUDGET
Now how much will you spend in your meeting will depend on how much the two of you can afford. If you are a rich then it’s cool that you can step up the game and plan for something grand like romantic candle in a high-class restaurant with a skyscraper view, prepare expensive gift and live in a resort. But if you’re a little less fortunate like me and my husband (XD) then you ought to go for a budget friendlier options.
First we choose the type of accommodation we want to stay in and how much we can afford. We don’t want something that is too shady, crappy and far from all the places we want to go for our first meet up, so we ended up choosing something around 3-star hotel at the city center. We use AGODA, a hotel app that allow you to compare all the prices of the hotel on the city you want to go. You can also filter things up like base one the amenities and location that you want. It also has the pay later system and if you did any mistake in your booking, you can always call or mail them to ask for help. They have really good sales service.
Secondly, we decided on the things we want to do when we’re together base on how much we can afford. In our case, we decided to go for a movie, KTV (karaoke), arcade and simple meals from Kuala Lumpur famous food stalls food in kopitiam. There is one exception where we go to a more expensive restaurant called Ding Tai Feng in Mid-Valley mall because I wanted him to try real Chinese dim-sum! Make sure the plan that you make involves with both what you and your partner wants and what you two can do together as a couple. Don’t make this meet up in just all about you or him/her only.
After planning where the both of you want to stay and what you want to do, it’s time to calculate how much the two of you need in total in order to make this meet up works. After calculating, you can divide 50/50 in how much each of you need to contribute. For me, even if you can cover all the cost for your partner, I would still suggest you to let him or her contribute as much as they can so, the two of you can see each other’s effort in making this work.
4) Letting your friends and family know that you’re going to travel
Don’t secretly go meet someone without letting anyone know. At least let one of your friend and family member know that you are going to travel and meet someone especially if it’s in another country. Don’t let them worry about you suddenly going missing and ended up calling you nonstop while you’re on your date with your partner. You wouldn’t want that to happen! Or in any case of any emergency things that happen, your friend or family will not have any heart attack and there is someone that you can contact. Safety first!
5) Time to meet your love one in person!
Finally, after all the planning, saving and waiting, the day of your first meet up has arrived! It is time to implement what the two of you have planned. It may sound funny but try not to back out and run away due to nervousness! If you feel like running away, remember to take a deep breath and calm yourself down. Make sure you and your partner have packed your bags, got your passport and all legalities done (if there is any) ready if you’re flying overseas. Get to the airport 3 hours earlier if you’re flying overseas to avoid meeting obstacles that can cause you to be left behind by the plane.
After meeting for the first time:
- Make sure to look each other at the eyes and be grateful that the two of you safely reach your destination and,
- Able to finally feel each other’s touch for the first time! Time to enjoy each other’s company
- Appreciate the time that you can spend together in person.
- Avoid using your phone as much as you can so the two of you can fully make use of the time that you have together.
- Be flexible with your plan. A lot of times things don’t turn out exactly the way we plan, so be creative with it if there’s a need of change.
For me, I got sick on the day before we’re going to part ways. Our original plan was to go karaoke, but my husband saw my face being very pale, he got worried and so we decided to go back to our apartment-hotel that we rented. I was quite sad that I thought I might have spoil our fun due to my weak immune system, but instead, my husband went grocery and cook a simple dinner for me at that time. I felt so touched!
(Photo credit by PEXELS – Rosie Ann)
Make sure both you and your partner be a little thorough on the important part on your first meeting, like WHEN you can meet and for how many days. Plan a meet up in a middle-country in WHERE the two of you would like to meet up.
After that, plan the budget on how much the two of you can afford in where would you want to stay and things that the two of you want to do.
Finally, tell at least a friend or a member of your family that you’re going for this trip to meet the person you love and don’t run away no matter how nervous you are!
I hope you enjoy this post and find this helpful for you! Be sure to drop a comment if you have any suggestion or would like to tell your experience!